Why?
Stacie Ashlet

Why do I feel this way,
Why is it happening to me,
All along I’ve played my part,
Now my life is falling apart.

I look for happiness,
Or I look for the light;
I want to die in the middle of the night.
I try so hard to look for an end,

My hearts so empty it will never end.
I need a heart, I need a soul,
I have to accomplish at least one goal.

Why is it hard, why is it me?
I try so hard to let things be.
Why is this happening, what have I done?

I’m fucking 16 I need some fun.
I’m falling apart and so is my heart.
Why is this happening to me?

~~~

This poem helped me, when I was in a bad stage of depression, One day last year I felt so horrible with myself, I thought about suicide. I had a knife in my hand, kept asking myself whether I wanted to do it, I thought about a lot of negative things for a while... Then I realized I should be telling myself positive things, then I ended up putting the knife down, Getting a piece of paper and writing out this poem, after that I felt much better.

- Stacie Ashlet

---

Pirates "

Aye me harties" the captian said,

As he tumbled out of bed.

"We've got a long day to find the tresure,

That will give me lots of pleasure.

So up the crows nest lads,

And scan the wide horizon man to man."

"LAND AHOY" the look outs cried,

"Man the boats lads we'll not be denied."

Very soon they found there tresure,

The captian gave each man his measure.

They drank the captians health in rum,

And all were very pleased they'd come! -

Stacie Ashlet

 

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The Mask
Stacie Ashlet

Writings from the Heart

by

Kirsty Munro

Its Over

If you are Expecting me to cry then you've got me all wrong

I f you think I'm going to shed a tear for you obviously you haven't known me for long

If you thing I'm gonna sit im my room desperately thinking of you

then you have another thing coming cuz I have better things to do!!!!!!

If you think I'm going to talk mice to you and try to get on your good side

Then I don't know what you are thinking because I have to much pride.

I you are waiting for me to call and beg for "one more try" then Baby don't wait for the phone

CUZ THIS................TIME IT IS MY GOODBYE

My Grandfather

My love is so deep just like a open sea

It well go on for ever more into Eternity

when I was brought into your life Angels smiled upon me

with you came a whole new world to me my soul was then set free.

And ever since that Beautiful day my thoughts are turned to you so to your shining star above

I'll always Remember you When it is my time to leave this earth to rise to above

I'll already know what it is like for having you my Grandfather

If you Love Him

If you love him anough you will leave him If he loves you so much why doesn't he show it

When you walk past each other in the street' he don't even Bother looking'

because he is with the fella's

When he wants something he Expects you to run and jump for him

When you need a leading hand He makes fun of you with all he's friends

BUT when you are alone he is so sweet so kind you are so confused for what to do,

So in the end you feel low and blue

Because you are wasting your love on something that isn't even true.

Poem

I'm sorry I didn't say good-bye, Who would have thought this is how we would be

this is what has become, of what was once you and me

apart of my heart you don't say a word but every soft whisper in your heart

I know is heard when Ido hear your voice calling out to me

I turn to run to you then I know you cannot be

I reach out to touch you to hold you once again, but you don't reach back

leaving an emptiness within my hand sweeps across the ground where you know peacefully sleep

Longing for you to reach up and rise from the grave,So deep.

I gently kiss your name engraved upon the star

left to cry at you grave side, left to cry alone

I long to know, so many good-byes, hurt so badly, I wish I could have been there for you.

and often think of taking your same vale

But then I think of all life's blessings without all blessings you did without

I will face all of lifes baffles with out you, by my self

I can't help thinking if I had fought them with you? would it be you, who would have died ?

I'm sorry I wasn't there for you, but I will never leave you, nowor forgive mysel

never say good-bye, I know I will see you once again, but I now I must go on.................

Somehow Tears drop from my grieving eyes as I lay roses at your side,

I am left to cry at your graveside, left to cry alone

...............

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Ambivalence
Damien Trimingham

Embroiled in a drug-filled haze
Melting defense
Got lost in amaze.
Lost to my own desire to hurt
Lost to the girl
And a white powdered dirt.
Confused the emotion of pleasure and pain
Playing my life
Like playing a game.
Caught in my own
Self-spinning web
Fighting a war that exists inside my head.
The inner child has lost to the man
That could not see past
An indifferent plan.
Lost every rational thought in my head
Caught in a shell
With nothing but time.
And now as I watch
Yet I'm shielding my eyes
With a needle protruding
I'm feeding the lies
A memory, a thought
A relinquishing sigh
A decision to make
To live or to die.
To be
Or to be not, said the guilt ridden Dane
To find out the truth
And finish the game.
Watching the screen now my battles been won
But what of the kids
Whose battle goes on?
Understand, educate and never be blind
To the drug that steals
Health spirit and mind

~~~

Written about his addiction

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Miss Heroin
Unknown addict

So now little man
You've grown tired of your grass
And someone is pretending to be your friend
Said 'I'll introduce you to miss Heroine'
Well honey, before you start messing with me
Just let me tell you how it will be
For I'll seduce you and make you my slave
Believe me, we have sent stronger men to the grave
You think you could never become a disgrace
And end up addicted to poppy seed waste
You start by experimenting one afternoon
And end up asleep in my arms pretty soon
Then once I have entered deep in your veins
The craving will drive you nearly insane
You'll need lots of money as you have been told
For darling, I'm worth more than gold
You'll swindle your mother just for a buck
and turn into someone who's vile and corrupt
You'll mug and steal for the narcotic charms
Then feel so content when I'm in your arms
Then you'll relise the monster inside you has grown
And solemnly swear to leave me alone
But if you think its easy, that you've got the knack
Then sweetie, try getting me of your back
The vomit, the cramps, your guts in a Knot
The jangling nerves screaming for one more shot
The hot chills, the cold sweats of the withdrawal pains
Can only be saved by the little white grains
So now you've returned, (just as I foretold)
And now you'll give me your body and soul
You'll give me your morals, your conscience, your heart
And now your all mine to Death do us part

~~~

The Grip of the Drug

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On This Day
Donna Kittel

On this day the third year gone,
Of the one I loved beyond compare,
Jesse, brown eyed and fair of hair,
I felt alone and full of despair,

I turn on the computer, long of face,
To kill the time, to dull the mind,
What I found, made the heart race,
I found there friends of all kinds.

To share my sorrow and soothe my mind,
From all nations and far and near.
Sharing their words to soothe my ears.
Sharing the sorrow of one held dear.

Jesse my heart, we have family here.
Family with heart, Family held dear.

Cyber friends far and near,

~~~

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Rebirth
Jesse Kittel

The light fades from a Northern sky,
There’s beauty all around,

It’s hiding in the stars on high,
And in every little sound,

Midst even the most barren soil,
The shoots of new life abound,

For all across this mortal coil,
The winds of new hope blow,

And in the ashes of my heart,
Loves springs forth anew,

For I’ve been granted a new start,
And now know what to do,

I’ll not now let a chance go by,
But learn from what I’ve found,

And nothing now shall ever spoil,
This chance for me to start anew.

~~~

Written by Jesse 2 weeks before his death,
when he came out of rehab with hope in his heart.

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When You Dream

When you dream, they are waiting there,

They talks to you with silent voice, All those doubts, and all those fears.

They will be no more, when they are near,

Hushed voices harmonious, without a care,

Soft rustling of wings, the serenity there,

The end of pain, the peace that's gained

In heaven or some other plane.

Just tranquil memories, no anxious minds.

The tormented souls are left behind.

You are both as one for all dreams time.

When you dream, they are in your mind

Then you wake, it comes rushing in,

The silent tears slip off you chin,

You count the moments until you dream

To be as one and all that means.

So wear a smile, don't despair,

How can they be gone, when they are here,

In your heart, all through the years.

In happy times or silent tears.

In your dreams, they are waiting there

Donna for Jesse 2003

 

ENTRIES IN YOUTH WEEK COMP APRIL 2003

2003

BOTTLED UP

I'm always by myself, Sitting on a train,

My life is such a mess, I'm always in pain.

I have so much to say, My mouth will not work,

I have to let it out, It's starting to hurt I try to write it down,

Can't think of how to say, My feelings are all crushed,

and I'm in dismay. My feelings are inside,

I have to let them out, Nobody to tell,

and I can't seem to shout. I'm bound down by tight chains,

I want to get free, It seems I always feel that nobody loves me.

But you've always loved me, I know this is true,

And for as long as I live, I will love you too.

So, when I think of this, things are not so bad,

Thankyou for loving me, Love, I'll always have.

Christopher Csabonyi---Sydney Australia

Best Darwin Entrant--gift voucher

THE MASK

I’m a special glow, I hear,

In Friendly peoples Eyes. My face is filled with smiles,

But my heart is filled with lie's. I have a mask that’s always on,

And no one knows its there. When I slightly take it off,

People stop and stare. I wonder when the day will come,

When I can chuck it out. And will I be that friendly child,

Who was never in any doubt. I fill the world with happiness,

Making people smile is my job. When I’m all alone at home,

I sit around and sob. I have a painful life you see,

It’s just the way I am. There's nothing I can change or do.

To make the girl I once knew.

Stacie Ashlet---Darwin, Northern Territory

AFRAID

Like a little lost child I sometimes feel this way

I try and hide the emotion But it doesn't seem to go away

A sudden gust of wind sends shivers down my spine

I find myself running to find a place to hide

When the tears begin to subside I begin to wipe my cheeks

But the pain is still inside And will not be released

I fall to my knees and my force becomes so weak

I don't how to face it I don't how to try

I feel like this is the greatest feat that has occured in my life

It's a bridge slowly falling into the water beneath

If only I had someone here to catch me from my feet

As the shadows start to loom I see them closing in

It's like your trapped and you can't get out

What are you to do when you feel this way? Afraid

Chloe Rawhiti Darwin NT

SURROUNDED

The rain falls down On top of me

The clouds cover my eyes So that I can’t see

The fog has me surrounded So that I can’t leave

I am imprisoned Until I believe

I am imprisoned Because I am different from the rest

Because I act strangely And I didn’t pass their test

And I ask you now Will you please let me go

Let me be myself Let my true colours show

Zoey Mitchell---Caboolture Queensland

WORLD VISION

On the ground lay a boy at the age of 13

This boy had no family, no shoulder to lean

Living by himself but surrounded by other people living in poverty

As he stood up he asked, “why is this happening to me?

He leant over and drank some dirty water And the food supply was getting shorter

As he started crying, sad he started to feel He was in great pain and feeling very ill

He looked up into the sky and started to pray

Tired and desperate there he lay Independence at so young

Not knowing a new miracle had began

This boy had now been sponsored I’ve been touched by an angel he said

He now has clean water and more food to eat Even shoes for his sore bare feet

This boy has now an education Just another sponsor from the nation

But don’t you think there should be more? Please help today and don’t ignore

For there is many people dying each and every day

Please pick up the phone and say “I want to sponsor a child”

And make someone else’s life worthwhile

After all it’s your decision If not, what is your world vision?

Kiah Fereday-----Darwin NT

WHY????

Why are you taking all them pills babe, Why are you screwing yourself up,

You used to be so friendly girl, You once knew how to laugh,

There's nothing i can do now, Its your life, Its up to you,

Id really like to help you, But i dont know what to do.

Why are you shooting up babe, Is it because of your mum,

She already loves you, You dont have to get involved in that stuff,

All your money is wasting away, And you sacrifice your food,

Just for a hit once a day, To make you feel so good.

I remember when you started with weed, It didnt worry me too much,

Just a bit of fun, It wasnt ever ment to harm,

But now your a heavy user, Not of weed, but the other drugs,

I never knew our first cone would, Lead you down hell's path.

It hurts me inside to see you like this, I know that you have dreams,

You say you wanna car someday, But how are you going to afford this,

All your money down the drain, and All your friends are gone,

But i'll still always love you babe, If you ever decide to come home.

Emma--------Darwin NT

LIFE

Why is life so confusing? With its weird, mysterious ways.

Why can’t things be so simple? So I can plan out all my days.

It dishes out the rubbish, It sorts through out the pain.

And sitting here I wonder, What do I have to gain?

What does my life hold for me? What will the outcome be?

I wish I had a vision, So at least that I could see.

Exactly what my path is, Or where I have to go.

What I have to really do, I’d really like to know.

I’m sick of all the guesswork, Of what I’m doing, if it’s right.

What I say or how I feel, I Just can’t see it in my sight.

I just need some answers, Or someone, to reassure.

To tell me now, that things are right, That I’ll make mistakes no more.

So sit I will, and wait again, To see, what happens, when?

I just hope I last the mile, Well let’s see what happens then!

Helen Hayden----Vicoridge Kennels, NSW

JAMES PARTY

. Im leaving James' Party now, And there all a bit pissed.

As i pull out onto the kerb, I got a phone call, It was my mum,

She said "Where are you?, Hows the party going?"

"I've just left" I said "I'll be home in 10". "Dont worry mum, Im not drunk,

And i didnt take no drugs. Mum i just drank soda water, Gotta go now mum, bye"

. As i pulled up at the lights, They turned green.

I can see a bright light, What the hell. Im laying on the pavement now,

How did i get here? I see the paramedics,

Standing over me. Just standing over me, Just looking at me.

I hear one of them say, She'll be dead in a short while.

Why me, he was drunk, He hit me, Why should i pay for ones mistakes.

I dont wanna die, Not like this.

ican feel sharp pains now, Pains just like a knife.

Its so painful to breath, And im gasping for air.

So here goes, Tell my brother to be brave. Tell mum not to cry, I'll be an angel for you and dad,

Tell my family ilove them all. So please dont drink and drive,

All it does is distroy lives. Hey mum at my furneral,

A song of your choice. And tell my friends not to cry,

As they lower me down.

All my true friends, In life, shall appear. And if i can count them all on one hand,

Im doing better than Jesus, Im taking my last painful gasp for air

. Written for Ashley Wels

1982 to 13 October 2002

Killed by a Drunk Driver

Zane Gineste

HE WANTS

He wants to be the kid with the chemicals,

He wants to never be home again

He wants to have his dangerous friends the ends unwind

He’ll always find they’ll always leave him in the end

He wants to be the kid with the broken home he wants his scarred and damaged wrists

He wants the fast and flying fists the first, the last the hurt, the heart

He thinks that he’ll be never missed he wants to be the kid on the precipice

He wants the wind to catch his hair he wants the crowds to stop, to stare the

Blazing lights the nighttime flight that final leap into the air

Nadia Bailey, Eltham, Victoria.

MUSIC ETERNAL

Listen… Listen to the ancient metaphysical score Immortal, intangible

To that which existed before the restrictions of time Before mortality and human iniquity

Beyond that which was borne of transient utterance,

Somewhere above this present world

Of irregular contour and polymetric uncertainty

Harmonic dissonance and unresolved suspension

Where fate seems alleatoric and breath ephemeral

Through the atonality of imminent demise

Past the complex cross-rhythms and capricious dynamics of life

To where the Maestro gently sways his baton,

Delineating an eternal cadence, Immutable, unchanging,

Calming in its assured stasis Listen to the Silence, gently throbbing,

Its steady pulse alternately inducing life, And life’s alluring inevitable counterpart, death

Listen to the music Within which we are perhaps individual notes

Each responsible for our own inflexion, our intonation,

Our underlying passion, and resultant emphasis

Our lives strung together to produce melodies

Bound together by the Master’s stroke

Intertwining fragments within phrases within movements of Symphonies

Listen To the infinite music

Emily Lynar (Canberra,ACT)

 

*BUDI*

Young, sweet and beautiful, Left us all behind to enjoy life,

Which he wasn't able to continue, He has left us and gone far far away,

In our hearts is where he will stay,

More and more everyday, we realise how much we miss him,

The tears we cry will never fade, He's so adorable which is how he was made,

Soccer was his game, But it will now never be the same,

He lives only in our hearts, where he belongs

Crossroads was his song and now he's gone, for who knows how long,

He was a part of us that we will always remember,

Every moment spent with him I will always treasure, His eyes, His smile, His talent,

Everything about him was so perfect, And to us he is very precious,

I dream about him every night and how I wish to see him again,

Not seeing him will never be the same, He was loved not only by us but by everyone,

He was a popular guy, Although never shy, Someday we are bound to meet again,

That will be the day when it will all be the same,

His soccer team was Brazil, And his player was Roberto Carlos,

His favourite number was 6, Every friday night he was out looking for chicks,

For how I wish he could stay, But it was god's decision for him to go away,

I hope he will always remember us, as we will never forget him,

The treasured love we held will never be forgotten, As he will always in our hearts stay...

*Your sis Aminah...* =2003=

Aminah Djumadi --- Darwin Northern Territory

1st Prize April Comp-$300 from Donna kittel

RAZORS

To you I look quite sane.

Inside I am a mad man that you just can't explain.

Sad songs bring a smile to my face.

Visions of hate bring warmth and grace.

Misery is my path to insanity.

Bleeding myself a necessity.

Blue skies can't stop the rain.

During this shameful time of pain.

The razor makes a new opening.

To stop the mental hurting.

I cut myself to feel free.

What the hell is wrong with me

. It is now time again.

To plan when I will bleed again.

Tomorrow when I feel depression

. The razor will bring new agression.

Look at me and can't you tell

. I am a living hell.

Jereme Virtue---- Doncaster

JUSTIN

This is your special day,

When you were born.

Even though that was so long ago,

Your memory is still in my heart and home.

Your lovely blue eyes were as, lovely as the deep blue sea.

Your hair was brown, The finest chocolate reminds me of you.

On the 5th December I start to cry,

I say to myself "why oh why".

On your special day, My love for you will never go away.

In loving memory for my brother Justin

written by

Racheal Trindall-- Ballina NSW

I HAVE NOTHING LEFT

-Feel my life taking a miss, I wish my life had more bliss.

There is missing something role a dice, If i role a six will my life be much more nice.

Will i find my special thing, I want some thing much more than a fling

Will i now longer be the one that is cold, Can i find some one that i can hold.

Do i feel I need to impress, Could this be why my life is such a mess.

I just want something good to come my way. I am sick of fighting my self every day.

To tell u the truth of what i want to do, I want to start up something big and new.

But at the moment alls i need is a 12 inch Knife,

I don't want to live in pain all my life.

Kylie Price--- Brisbane

ENCOUNTERING THE BEAST

- As I live in this day and age the ‘Beast’ no longer overshadows my life

The burden no longer determines my fate

The tests, pills, screenings, scans became part of my everyday life

The long, shimmering, curly hair once flowing down my very back fell out, inevitably due to time

I would roll the word around my tongue ‘cancer’

I littered the air with thoughts, thoughts of human value

Devoid of light The beast sought refuge in my flesh and blood, engulfing my whole being

The dust had settled I stood up in amongst the ruins

My flaming spirit soaring above amidst the stars in the sky

Will always be close to the angels Behind the heavenly clouds

Encountering the ‘Beast’ Obstacle after obstacle,

Milestones after milestone, Problem upon problem, A deadly battle was raging within my body

Optimism shone through With every choice I made,

With every step I took An essence of rich warmth washed over me

It was a mere miracle! My curls returned My spirit was over powering the ‘Beast’

My love of life intensified, amplified With my every laughter, with my every smile

Embracing the beauty that surrounded me that revolved around me

The presence of my newfound wings granted me the opportunity

to fly wind whipping my face, brushing my hair, crispy, fresh air full of life

Encountering the beast was a journey of discovery

The discovery of nurturing love of life love so pure, so deep, so true

Dispersed in the world for all to share

My body and soul is free from the chains that held me down

My love of life is no longer oppressed rather engraved not in sand but stone for it will never be erased

The waves will never wash it away

The ‘Beast’ I once knew Is destroyed by the love I posses

Footnote: This piece is an account of my best friends first hand experience with cancer.

Her name is Juanita Vea and she is my classmate at Gilmore College for Girls.

Angelique Christine Petrac

BEGUILED REALITY

- Grips you tight between Its jaws,

leaves you to float aimlessly hear the slow steady crackling of the fire red coals you cannot hear

It passing can you feel the heat embrace you?

wrap itself around your body, stinging your eyes yet warming your soul you cannot feel

Its breathing the wispy smoke is rising, watch it curl upward you cannot see

Its journey savour the taste of the cold night air mingled with the dark earthy scent of moss you cannot smell

It inching closer one ancient wrinkled hand beckons the other hidden from view it appears to be

clutching something yes, there is something within a presence; silent, invisible, odourless, numb that exists all the same

the hand opens slowly, painfully almost reveals a pocket watch

it feels cold pressed against your cheek

smells of a childhood fading, musty you don't need to see the unmoving hands,

absorb its silence to know it has stopped.

Just for a moment you let yourself imagine what it would be to take, to become, to have the power to stop to trap in a moment, the world and its contents.

you see the hand retreat long after you feel the blow it dealt to your chest startling you with realisation the watch is as insignificant,

as helpless as you a mere instrument that measures each passing moment but with no power of its own for it is time itself that causes the hands of a watch to stop smell

Its breath hear Its heartbeat taste Its energy feel Its vivacity see Its life because it will outlive you, and everything you know

Jandi Crocker

FIRE

A wilderness stretching into eternity; a thousand branches of warmth and love.

Maybe confused in direction - united in growth from warmth such heat did grow from grain;

a youthful innocence did glow.

Desolate - a cold dry night from warmth - the flicker - a spark.

Heat ignites the dark. On the green and colours many more black doth mark, a flourishing life burnt to the core.

It’s the death of one, the absence of momentary expectation - an incomparable grief.

A bushfire ripped through the heart, stripping emotion with a sheath.

It tore from existence strong life of thee, A scorched bare branch - epitomises me.

A dark cloud crosses - unhappiness now reigns much more deep.

A light drizzle does fall The rain doth seep - and soak.

The branches moist right through - a thousand branches cold and stripped in the dark

The long night through, dawn is awaken - a flood of colour - the destitute night is taken.

A perpetual pain to come again daylight hours merely a reprieve, from the time of dark -

to mourn and grieve

In time so far the sun doth leave its mark, The vitalised rain - a watering of the seed

On the dark grain, a hint of green the possible indication of more to flourish – a life to nourish.

And in this event, an onlooker would deem this life unscarred;

but the stripping of life - Internal existence - perpetually tarred.

Lani Studdards ---Darwin Nt

GREAT WORK EVERYONE

"CHANGES"

Smoking and choking When am I going To break these addictions

That cause bad afflictions Consuming toxin after toxin My head must have rocks in

The thoughts I am thinking My boat it is sinking

Need to get out and stop the ship Change direction of my trip

The smoke in my eyes Makes it hard to see my way Seeing through all the lies

I learn everytime I pray Time to make some changes In my life right now

Bad habits into good habits are the changes I need to make right now

No more thinking of what I should do Just start doing what I should do

Can't go on destroying my body As Gods' temple is my body

Time to clean up my sacred vessel Throw out demons I everyday wrestle

Let love and light into my soul

So I truly will Be made clean and whole

Kristy OKeefe

**********************************

ADDICTION NO MORE

Drug's and what it did to my life,

brought me pain and disruption and so much strife.

It frustrated me, hurt me and made me cry,

angered me, disturbed me, left me asking questions like "why".

I was feeling used and abused, dis-respected and cheated,

many a time i was cross conversation was heated.

I felt lost and alone, struggled to get through,

I wasn't sure what was a lie , and what was to be true.

And all of this caused by an addict , one that I loved and adored,

no it is not me,

the user you see, it is my brother who had been clawed.

They just done see that we too go through the pain,

every step of the way, my tears have fallen like rain.

to understand him I feel is to except, to except, i feel i have to let go of respect.

It's an on going fight, I will share all the way, always waiting for the final day,

when all the pain comes to an end, when he realizes heroin is not his friend.

But on I may tread forever and a day, "same old thing" I hear myself say.

When will he realize it's no good that heroin,

I'm hoping he will, as I don't want to bury him.

Lissa Griffiths---- England

 

ADULTS

3rd August comp-$50 fromDonna Kittel

A NOTE ON PASSING

I had a dark dream last night

Where all the dead people lied

They told me I reached the light

And in my sleep I died

-My sheets were stained in blood

My wrists were bruised and battered

At that time life was not good

Death was all that mattered

-What a life I could have had

The problems I could have solved

Just a few weeks of feeling sad

I would have live on and grown old.

-My precious life was stolen

Did I really want it to end ?

I could have kept rockin @ rollin

It was to late to make amends

-One life is all we are given

So stay alive while you still can

Stop dwelling and start living

Love life while you still can

STACIE ASHLET --DARWIN NT

**************************

BABY BROTHER

You left behind three sisters, Sis is what you called us.

We were all around when you were born, Four mothers you had to spoil you.

We rocked and pushed you for hours on end, For if we didn't you sure let us know.

The baby brother we possessed in our hearts, You were never a bother at all

Our Mother who bore you and loved you, With the greatest love of all,

Had to leave you when you were still quite small.

In the years there after you couldn't remember being with her at all,

We tried to tell you honestly, you were her greatest joy,

Now your up above and in her arms once more, safe within their folds.

The little boy inside you, will once again be loved

By the greatest love of all

DIANA DAVIDSON- PERTH WA

*********************************

CAN YOU"

Can you find the love and peace you hold within

Can you resist the temptation you feel to sin

Can you change your life and really start living

Can you learn to truly love others and appropriately giving

. Don't think that you are not strong enough

For there is no greater strength than Love

Picture yourself making it through

Don't let anything stop your making over you.

Tough at times, this will be true -But at the end, you'll feel brand new

Now, is the time, to properly follow Gods' trail, so you may be relieved of your suppressed sorrow.

Beginning again is half the fun This is the turning point, your life has only just begun

Facing your fears with Love

No longer will you feel you have to run

No longer to your head will you want to put a gun.

Can you turn to God, and let fully into your life

Can you let Gods love help you to change your life

Can you imagine all the amazing things God can help you do in your life

Can you.

K J O'KEEFE --Sanctuary Point. NSW.

********************************

2nd august comp-$100 from donna kittel

DONNA MAREE

Twinkle Twinkle Little Star

Now I know where you are

So when I look up into the sky

and wipe the tears from my eyes

Then I try to say goodbye

--But then I hear a little voice

It says don't worry Daddy

I'm up here on Gods great thone

It's alright Daddy I'm not alone

--Now I'm trying not to be sad

I'm thinking of all the beautiful times we had

--So now the only way, I can get through each day

Is to sit down and pray

Ask God to take this pain away

--So now it is time to let go

Of what was once mine

Because Jesus and Donna are doing just fine

Oh how I miss, the one I loved to hug and kiss

DAVID YATES--DARWIN NT

**********************************

NOBODY CARES

Do they do it for fun?--No one knows?

Do they understand what they are doing? Nobody cares

Do they stop what they are doing? --No way

Do I do things the wrong way?-- Nobody knows, nobody cares,

there's no way. Why do they do it for fun?-- No one knows

Why don't they understand? --No one cares

Why don't they stop?No way

Why can't I help?--Nobody knows,

Nobody cares there is no way

When do they do it?-- No one knows

When will they understand?-- No one cares

When will they stop? --No way

When will I learn?-- Nobody knows, nobody cares, there is no way

DEBBIE REDPATH --TASMANIA

****************************

winner of the August comp

1135 KYOCERA CDMA- PRE-PAID PHONE--WITH $100 FREE CALLS from Telstra country wide

WHEN

When I was a child, I wished I were a bird.

Flying high over the ground with wind under delicate wings,

High up I'd soar, I wanted more.

When I was a child, I lost sight of my dreams.

Life so hard to face each day Peer pressure pounded all the way.

Dreams they'd take, my wings did break.

And I stumbled through each day,

Looking for another way to fly that high, to leave the ground,

And spread my wings again. I thought I flew, for heavens sake,

Burnt black with every breath. I let

The Darkness eat at me I let the pain in me suppress.

When I was a child. I couldn't trust, I couldn't to soar,

Without the wings of mine.

Until I found a way to fly I nearly lost it all.

When I was a child.

But only starting to live each day,

Would The Darkness fade away

. My life now high, My soul is found, Bones heal,

I'll fly again.

ROBERT GRIFFIN --DARWIN NT-18 YEARS

 

*************************

Encouragement award

autographed copy of wendy j dunns novel

dear heart how like you

DEPRESSION

A termite of the soul,

A dark underworld, squeezing the very heart of your existence,

It leaves you starving for even the most cloudy dawn,

Death seems to be a better option, but it wont let you out of its clutches.

You have been robbed of the pleasures of life,

Robbed of your self-respect.

Gnawing-Ripping-Tearing at the person you once were,

To feel depression

Is to know what it is like to be held captive in a Nazi prison camp

Your own mind holds you captive to torture,

Every second an infinite pit of terror,

And you undoubtedly will sell your self to the devil

Just to breathe life----Once again..

JENNY BYRNE--DARWIN NT

2nd prize $50 from MLA DELIA LAWRIE

BUDI

Budi you left me behind,

without a sign,

It broke my heart,

Now Im torn apart,

You were everything to me

, Although now you will never be,

You were my bro for now and ever

You will leave me never,

I miss you like hell.

It flashes in my mind! The time you fell,

If only on that night! I was there,

I would have caught you never fear,

Though I never even knew,

You enjoyed playing sport,

Although sometimes you fought,

If I was able to bring you back,

I would do anything, even if I had to sing

. You and I once sang a song

Which I never will forget,

From the time we met,

Your always been in my heart,

and we will never be apart

Your sis** Aminah

AMINAH --DJUMADI --- DARWIN NT- 16 YEARS

***************************

3rd Prize $20 from mla delia lawrie & $20 voucher busy bee cafe

REMEMBER THIS

If Tomorrow starts with out me and I'm not there to see if the sun should rise

and fine your eyes all filled with tears for me I wish so much you wouldn't cry the way you did today

while thinking of many things, we didn't get to say.

I know how much you love me, as much as I love you

and each time you think of me I'll know you miss me too

. But when tomorrow start without me

Please try to understand that a Angle came and called my name and took my hand,

and said my place was ready, in heaven far above, and that I'd have to leave behind all them I dearly Love

. But as I turned to walk away a tear fell from my eyes,

for all me life, I'd always thought I didn't want to die.

I had so much to live for. So much yet to do.

It seems almost impossible That I was leaving you.

The god one and the bed, I thought of all the love we shared,and all the fun we had,

If I could relive yesterday, just even for a while

I'd say good-bye and kiss you and maybe see you smile

but then I full realized that this could never be

For Emptiness and memories would take the place of me

When I thought of worldly things I might miss come tomorrow

I thought of you and when I did My heart was filled with sorrow

But when I walked through Heaven's Gates I felt so much at home

When GOD looked down and smiled at me, from his great golden throne

he said "this is Eternity and all i've Promised you"

Today for life on earth is past but there it starts anew

I promise no tomorrow but today will always last

Since each day's the same way there is no longer for the past

You have been so faithful so trusting and so true

Though there were times you did some thing you knew you shouldn't do

You have been forgiven and now at last you are free

so won't to take my hand and share my life with me?

don't think we are far apart for every time you think of me

I'm right here in your heart.

I

KIRSTY MUNRO---KARAMA- DARWIN 14 YEARS

****************************************************

4th prize -voucher bbs - coffee & Bake

THE PAIN NO-MORE, LIFE IS NO-MORE, I'M NO-MORE

Some-times I feel like im drowning, Going in over my head and I can't swim.

I feel the pain with such vein, I feel my life growing dim.

Things cannot explain, to how or why I lose my way,

I know as each breath I take my life begins to fade.

The painful thoughts that run through my head,

I know this mess I have created, I know this mess I've made.

I can't help but see my life slip away, Into the depths of hell where I cannot escape the day.

The world today cannot help but run, Yet for me I just give up not attempting to go places.

All I can do is slip into the background and watch the world go by,

Make myself invisible and do not cry.

To all who care, I feel nothing but anger, To have some one by my side makes me feel trapped in all that I do

. I look down and see my wrists all bruised and batted,

And I wonder how it could come to this when nothing else mattered.

The pain to hard to bare, the risk of life no more,

I wish it could have been different but I bled out on the floor.

The sun setting on my life, my surroundings going dark,

As I take my last decent look around. The whole concept of death has finally destined upon me,

Yet the urge to die grows stronger.

The pain is no more; life is no more, I?am no more,

And with that thought I regret the suffering I have put you all in.

I wish the sun would shine so bright that you'll remember our good times,

Not that horrid night. Where you found me, lying on the floor, gasping for air,

It's nothing you have done or said its how I feel and that's it.

That sweet drowning sensation you couldn't stop

It's not your fault, im just controlling my own destiny,

It feels peaceful looking up knowing that the water above my head is too far to reach for air.

My life slowly fades away and I cant help but smile, smile for knowing you all,

to smile for the simple fact my life has slipped away and I now feel closure,

I feel happy to go away to start a fresh new life

. For the pain that grows no more, for the self-justice I have preformed,

Let me be as I was resting in peace watching the world go by as I sit stare and feel the pain is no more.

The pain is no more; life is no more, I'am no more,

NATALIE ROACH-- CASAURINA NT 16 yrs

***************************************

Winner August Comp under 16 yrs --$100 from MINISTER PAUL HENDERSON

I STAND WONDERING

I stand wondering, waiting, thinking, hoping, and watching.

Wondering; what I am doing here? What I should be doing?

Why I wait for something that never comes?

Waiting; Waiting for the desert to break and to see fresh water fall from the sky.

I wait and wait but it never comes. Hoping; I hope for MY outback happiness.

I hope to see what I am waiting for and pray that it comes yet I think. Thinkin; I think why?

I say to myself 'Why am I here? Why do I want to be here? Why I myself wait'?

Watching; watching the sky, watching the ground, watching the creatures scatter away from me.

Then all of a sudden it comes what I have been waiting for all of my life right in front of me. I see it,

I hear it, I feel it. It is wonderful to me the rain falling.

And now I look back and see there is duststorms, dusty floors, dusty houses and dust all around me.

I think why did I stay if it was so bad for me there. Then I think and see happy times and happy faces.

Laughter and smiles. Fun and games

. I think what I would give to have it all again because I am bored and getting boreder.

I would give my life I would give the rain and that is what I would go back to

MY Life. MY rain. MY happiness. MY laughter. MY ever lasting rain.

In MY outback Australia the sun is shining over me forever more.

Where I will always have my outback Happiness forever more.

And I will never be lonely again in my life with my friends and family be side me forever more.

With my outback happiness. All along I had what I was waiting for and hoping for.

I never knew that one signal fact.

Daphne Darling Alice Springs 14 Years

BACK TO COUNTRY

Oh take me back to Country to the land of my birth where my forefathers lived one with Mother Earth

The air was clean back then no pollution problems there children obeyed their parents guidance came from everywhere

The Elders were well respected Culture was very strong everyone knew their country handed down through song

When the intruders came they tried to tame the land they ignored Aboriginal Culture and still don't understand

They built concrete jungles and threw away our songs polluted this great land and did not see the wrong

The Law was broken down Aboriginal people dispersed many turned to alcohol to take away their hurt

They were taught Religion and the Promised Land they witnessed atrocities and could not understand

Although their spirit broken many returned to their land renewed Aboriginal Culture then the healing began

They learnt once again from the Dreamtime once more the importance of this Earth it has to be restored

There must be a re-growth the trees, the lungs of the Earth doesn't matter about the costs it must have new birth

Clean up your country all rivers and Billabongs do not forget each word that sung in your songs Life is like a spiders' web all things are entwined your efforts will be rewarded that will benefit mankind

Take me back to country to the land of my birth to dwell with my ancestors one with Mother Earth

Luke S Morcom (c) Darwin Aust

29/5/95

ENTRANTS IN THE FEBRUARY POETRY COMP

I LOVED LIZARDS, THAT'S A FACT

When I was a nipper, not very old,

Knee high to a grasshopper, or so I'm told.

I caught Lizard's an thats a fact,

 

Even caught Skinks in me old dad's hat,

I left them everywhere, An thats a fact,

Me sore rear end, can attest to that.

 

Me Mom, she was a shocking sight,

Screaming blue murder, white with fright,

She'd pulled up a Blue Tongue, with the Doona one night.

 

Me brother was the best , you see,

We had to go out side to take a pee,

Imagine the torch dancing across the flat,

Bang goes the door, to the loo out back.

 

Then all hell broke loose and that's a fact,

He came bolting out, an on his back,

A ruddy big Frilly, Oh what a sight,

His backside wobbling as he took flight.

 

I laughed so much, I near spit me sides

I sure loved lizards and that's a fact

J Mathers --Darwin NT

---

.3RD PRIZE

BACK FROM THE GRAVE

Two hours from Death the hospital said,

Another two hours and you'd have been dead,

For all the fun you had you said,

 

You didn't realise you could lose your leg.

We're going to open it up to see,if we can repair this misery,

You've caused yourself, with all the drugs you took,

 

So it's in with the scalpple and lets take a look.

I awoke in a daze with my head all fuzzy,

If i've lost my leg that would'nt be funny,

 

I cleared my eyes and looking down,

I saw two legs when I looked around.

The relief I felt I could'nt describe,

I had two legs........ ........ and I was alive.

 

The tale is true it's what I said,

I've gotta limp on my left leg, you're reading this and think it's fuuny

But I wouldn't do it again, for Drugs or Money.

Shane Kilford, Darwin NT

---

3.

WAITING FOR THE TRAIN

Standing at the crossing on the way to Berry Springs

Waiting for the freight train to come in

It's Saturday morning just before noon On lookers wishing and waiting for it to come soon

Berry Springs Volunteer Bush Fire Brigade there So too the NT Police warning Territorians to beware

There's power in them engines so stay clear of those rails

Let this freight train through without fail

People everywhere patiently waiting on the line In great anticipation will it be on time

Ron Thomas on the VHF Radio checking location of the train

Rural folks are out in force hoping that it won't rain

People everywhere relaxing with tea and coke

Gone are the days when the railway was a joke

Finally at last a dream has come true A rail service to Darwin for me and for you

What's that awesome sound coming from around that bend

Get out those cameras and focus your lens

Seeing is believing at long last a train A ray of sunshine snaking along those rails

An orange locomotive with a crocodile design Proudly drawing carriages safely along the line

A helicopter above and reporters in a planeAll taking photographs of our historic train

Saturday the 17th day of January in the year 2004

Will long be remembered and worth waiting for

Get out the champagne time for a celebration

At last a rail link to the rest of the nation

Building the future remembering the past A tribute to those who never lost heart

They dared to dream a great vision plan Not for themselves but Territorians

Chief Minister Clare Martin is very happy at last

A hundred year promise has come to pass

A great day of celebrations blessed by no rain

Territorians will remember the arrival of their train

Luke S Morcom --Darwin NT

---

2ND PRIZE JUNE COMP 2004

4

WALLABY JACK

I live in a place called Australia My name is Wallaby Jack

I live in the Northern Territory In the great outback

I moved from the city And I'm never ever going back

 

I'm happy in my environment Living in my newly built shack

Here the wedge-tail eagle Is king of the sky

Just look at him flying Soaring ever so high

He smiles down upon me Living in my little shack

Watching out for strangers Any freshly made tracks

 

Out here in the bush There's plenty of fresh air

Not like in the city Pollution everywhere

There's plenty of bush tucker Here for me to eat

Having hot cup of tea With damper and bully beef

Sitting under a shady tree Eating kangaroo meat

 

My faithful blue heeler resting He has had enough to eat

There's plenty of room for me Out here I am the boss

A great land of opportunity Under the Southern Cross

If you ever come to Australia And want to visit the great outback

When in the Northern Territory Just ask for Wallaby Jack

 

(Jack Manguj) Darwin NT 11-3-02

---

 

STORM

I hear the rain a falling, Upon my metal roof.

The tinkling down the drain pipes, The squelching of my boots.

 

Dim the outside looks, Inside, warm and glowing.

Thunder is that hollow sound And lightning is what it’s throwing.

 

Howling is the monstrous wind, Tearing at my coat

. Its bite is of chilling ice, And in my face it gloats.

 

Powerful is the storm, Which ravages the land.

Respect is in it’s glory, When it holds you in its hand!

 

Sarah Thomson --Moculta S Australia

---

6

A Poem for Gabe

Not you big brother... not you

One day he was here, And the next he was gone

When I look back I see, He was gone for so long

I miss the boy inside him, The boy that I knew

Once that damn drug touched him, The pain inside him grew

We used to watch t.v. We used to read books

We'd argue and fight, And give each other mean looks

But most of all we laughed, At your corny jokes

We'd sit around and talk, Or just lay there and smoke

We had our futures mapped out, Who we would marry

I'd be Mrs. Breisch, He'd be Uncle Gabey

He was so smart so talented, He had so many dreams

It's hard to believe that now, They're all ripped at the seams

Now I'm all alone, He left me here all alone

Who's gonna laugh with me?

Who's gonna cry with me?

Not you, big brother No no, not you

Josie Bowman -- New Castle USA

---

7

 

Corporal John Leslie Ridley No 547 35th Battalion

Killed in Action 6th May 1918 RIP

---1918---

Rock a bye old lady , in your wicker rocking chair

Rid yourself of lasting sorrow , ban your every care

But a task like this , impossible , when your heart is broke and battered

When dreams and aspirations , with one message have been shattered

“Killed in action” , overseas, aged just twenty four!

Her eldest child , her favourite son, returning home , no more

She wipes the falling teardrops, with a shaking work worn hand

Her brimming eyes so lifeless and she’ll never understand

The need for such a sacrifice , the pain too hard to bear

The anguish of remembrance, reminders everywhere

His picture on wall-papered slabs , shows stamina and pride

The flush of youth , ambitious zeal , that could not be denied

His leather pit boots on the hearth , ingrained with fine dust coal

The blackened crib tin waiting too, Dark as her own soul

But somewhere in the fields of France, in Villers Brettonneux

This lady’s son is resting , down where the poppies were

The toddler oh so innocent , at four, untouched by war

So ignorant of hurt or pain of the bloody battles’ gore

Approaches, her poor Granny and strokes her bowing head “Why are you crying Granny? ‘

Cause Uncle Jack is dead!?” Her Granny sighs and stokes the fire, she hugs the tiny child

“Let’s hope and pray , when you bear a son , all wars will be resiled

They risked their lives and limbs at home to seek the Diamond Coal

But they’d never guess an unknown foe, would take their very soul.”

---2002---

Now many years have passed us by , that tiny child grown old

Rocks gently in her rocking chair , she cannot be consoled

“I fear for my Great Grandchildren , the future holds no hope

With every country in the World , on a downhill sliding slope!”

Her mind it tends to wander, the past to her is lost

Except for this one memory, her Grandma’s fearful cost

She forgets the pain of her baby’s death and her husband’s life so short

Ingrained upon her troubled mind , is the loss of a soldier who fought

So, when today’s precocious toddler , grows old , inevitably I wonder if, when she reflects ,

her long time memory will be, of a grey haired lady , crying , sad , forlorn Lamenting of those troubled days .

Many years since she was born. I’d hope and pray her memories , would be of puddles in the rain

Of Grannie surfing on the net , or a ride on a mighty steam train Or a quiet picnic in the park , with the sight of the gulls on high

With sailing boats and fishermen , gliding, gently by

So rock a bye old lady, in your wicker rocking chair Rid yourself of sorrow , ban your every care

Val Wallace Glendale NSW

---

8.

Contradictalia

Both sides of the coin appear as one, As we make two Australia's seem like fun

A barren landscape in the centre, And greeting cities when you enter;

Sadness rains for those in drought, But when it rains, there's frowns about,

With people rich and people poor, And peace about while where at war;

Are we a continent in the sun, Or an island where rivers run?

We have desert, snow, rain and fire, Our land keeps changing, a living liar;

With Medicare to keep us healthy, But bulk billing is going stealthy,

While some suicide before their old, Or keep bringing babies into our fold;

If we try to change something wrong, Our pollies sing the same old song,

That other countries are far worse, And we mustn't turn to the public purse;

And while they tell us that they care, Government white ants away our welfare,

And buys votes in our Democracy, Enshrining Oz hypocrisy;

?????????????????

The mad are happy, and happy, sad,

The sad are mad, the sappy, glad,

We all want the latest fad, But when where bored, where not so bad;

Our kids have too many rights, But can't stand to come home at nights,

To drunk parents who always fight, Or wishing their kids were out of sight;

The child grows up, a learned entity, While facing levels of dual identity,

Madness festers like a sore, But no ones mad, it's against the law;

There's more work around than we can fill, And long weekends where we work still,

Balancing books and paying bills, And buying food, filling others' tills;

A lucky country where hunger drives, A clever country where drugs thrive,

Where smiling people take their knocks,

Is Oz a paradise or paradox?

But I love it here where I am free, And I choose which side of me you see,

It's not the lightning, but the thunder, You should fear most here down under.

Craig Seiler -- Darwin NT

---

1ST PRIZE JUNE COMP 2004

Rash Move

My son was burning up and getting hotter by degrees,

As Tylenol and tepid baths did little to appease.

The skerrick that went down the hatch was soon up – in the bucket.

A hiccup on our holiday? It seemed we might have struck it.

Because we shared a little van, I hoped it would pass quick.

I wasn’t in a panic though, as kids are often sick…

Until I saw those neat, red dots, adorning arms and legs.

– “Chicken Pox!” I wildly thought,“He’s got them, sure as eggs.”

The learned health professional, consulted on the spot,

Was quick to say, (to my relief!) that “Chicken Pox it’s not.”

He diagnosed a virus, though just what, Doc wasn’t sure.

That rash was unlike any he had come across before.

Prescribing medicine to keep the vomiting at bay,

The doctor then advised that we enjoy our holiday.

Well as the day proceeded, I was quite surprised to find

Those speckles faded out of sight, which eased my anxious mind!

Much wiser now, with hindsight, I confess that I was rash,

To seize my spotted son and seek the doctor at a dash.

Those dots, which came on suddenly, and gave me such a fright,

Weren’t symptoms of the virus – they were merely sandfly bite!

Kathryn Apel -- Mount Tom, Qld.

---

Natures dreams

Here I sit in solitude,

By a stream in the nude,

In a forest clearing vast,

Try to think about the past,

Massive Oaks with boughs like thews,

Listen carefully, they give news,

Alive with motion from a breeze,

Listen to the wind through leaves,

Crickets chirping, leaping frogs,

Snakes are draped over logs,

Vines intwined with the trees,

Flowers buzzing from wiild Bee's,

Should you look down in the Brook,

See fish hiding within their nooks,

A flash, a dart, a silver sheen,

Now, no longer can they be seen,

Vegetation with wild colors,

Young and cubs suckled by their mothers,

No where else can this be seen,

Apart from in someones dreams.

Ashley Brooks-- Darwin N T

 

---

UNDER 16S

---

FIRST PRIZE JUNE COMP 2004

Our Country

Our country is full of many colours

From the red hot sand of the desert

To the warm blue colours of the sea

From the cold white snow on the moutains

To our tropical rain forests with their multi-coloured trees

 

Our country is one of beauty

Our animals unique and rare

From the dangerous crocodiles and snakes

To our cuddly koala bears

 

Our country is one full of tradition

From our mateship in the war

To the shrimp on the old barbie

And our cricketers receieving a roar

 

Our country is Australia, a place we call our own

A country thats so intriguing, a place im proud to call my home.

Chloe Smith 15 years

---

I cannot stop this feeling,

That is deep inside of me,

Even after all the lies and screaming matches,

I close my eyes and act to blind to see.

Numerous eyes upon me,Watching me slowly break.

I just turn my thoughts up loud,

Watch me dance away the heartache.

I'd dance till dawn to keep my mind off of you,

Losing myself to the music, Is all I know how to do.

Love is by Far, The hardest dance of all!

But by keeping my heart moving,

The dance becomes my wall.

By Angela Linda Carroll

---

I wake up early, the aching of my stomach is screaming.

I do not want to get up, the thought of being skinny is just too much.

Idrag myself out of bed and go for a run,

I dont seem to care that my body is yelling at me to stop,

I just keep telling myself that with every step I'm getting closer to my dream of perfection

. I manage to make it home today, I collapse and wait for my head to stop spinning.

I slowly walk to the bathroom and stare hard into the mirror.

I see more bones today, a smile creeps upon my face, good this is what I want.

I float to school, no one sees me there anyway. home again,

I devour half a carrot, its all too much, the guilt, the fat.

Back to the bathroom to remove my only fuel.

Its like a drug,Iim addicted to, too much is never enough

Just like skinny is never skinny enough,

My parents come home and the fighting begins

I feel bad, I hate what Im doing to them,

Sometimes the feelings are over whelming and its just too hard,

I carve myself with a knife until I see red.

I could finger paint with my blood, I could paint my end.

I cry myself to sleep and await the next day,

I know that soon I wont have to worry about waking up

I soon will take my addiction to the next level

I just know that you arent really seen until your invisible......

Chloe Smith........Darwin NT

---

 

2 nd PRIZE

On The Far Side Of The Moon

C'mon let me take you on a trip

I want to see you come alive

We'll slide into the stardust

Where high swingers groove and jive.

Bright lights will flash and fizzle

Never mind that dish and spoon

Join the moocows and come jumping

On the far side of the moon.

C'mon let me take you on a trip

I want to see you smile and shine

You'll spread your wings and do those things

That make young girls feel so fine.

Where lone wolves howl the whole night long

And stray cats croon in tune

We'll swing and sway and play all day

On the far side of the moon.

C'mon let me take you on a trip

Where I'll hold you oh so tight

And the magic of the moment

Will make you feel just right.

Big stars will glow and twinkle

The sun won't shine till noon Small birds will sing.

We'll do our thing

On the far side of the moon.

Ed O'Toole

---

CRYSTAL

She took me into her arms and told me that she cared

My pain, My fears, My secrets, all with her I shared

Her face was made of beauty, Her heart was made of stone, and everything she wanted was everything I owed

When I first had met her I had promised to obey, to stay right by her side each and everyday.

.She seduced me into needing her, I'd never be the same everyday a constant struggle of trying to stay sane.

Just as she requested I gave everything she asked, then she whispered in my ear, what she wanted last

All that I had given her I guess was not enough, My soul was what she wanted, So I had to give it up.

Full of deceit and power, her name is Chrystal Meth

The love affair I had with her,

Ended in my death

Kayleen Hughes

29th 9 2002

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Suffering you

Take me suffering, by my heart tonight

Embroidered with your scars I am delirious

Abandoned to hell in here I sit craving you

Implanted with your breath in my wake

Suffering you - you take my breath away

Suffering you - you spill on me your gift of pain

Suffering you - you feed in me my desire for more

Suffering you - your divine sweat I thirst to temper mine

Brand my soul, your salvation takes flight

Ripen in me my fruits of agony to taste you

Prey I, upon your sweet poison,

this life It - upon your icy cement hails divine

Suffering you - you curse me with your kiss

Suffering you - you temper my delicacy,

your haste Hinder in me suffering -the pleasures that glow

My mentor you - are that which is my graceful breath

The Angels clothe you leader

Follower I do embrace you for you are you alone

Suffering you - your heart the Angels gather

To hear you, embrace you and learn from you their might

Marion van der Walt

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VALENTINES DAY 05

My brain dosent work when she is near,

Like someone blew confetti in my ear,

The twinkle in her eyes cause me terrible fear,

I wonder, Would it be easier if I were queer,

Wife dont give, I'm vulnerable its plain,

Scientist say stimulus releases drugs in the brain,

Concentration shot, I fear an accedent and pain,

Please Doctor am I going insane????

*****

TRANQUILITY

I enjoy the quiet and here I sit and think,

Naaagghh-ah prrruuupp,plip,plop,--------plink,

I wonder what increment did my weight just shrink,

Something is wrong I fear< My eyes begin to squint and blink,

Oh what a foul smell what a stink,

By chance the element in the light bulb goes "tink"

I'm fearfull of the dark, there is no light threw any chink,

Near panic for my pants I reach, it's black in here like ink,

With steadied heart my gold lighter I thumb, Kar-link,

I'm ingulfed in a flash of flame, all violet blue and pink,

My pwbic hair and eye brows scorched in a wink,

And the last of the toilet paper , in flames to the floor it sinks.

Bob Napier - Darwin NT 3/2/04

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I was feeling down, despondent, though I could not figure why. Hell… perhaps it was the weather and the fact that things were dry. It’s a soul sapping experience when blue skies will not cease, bringing melancholy moments when one’s soul cannot find peace. Then my mood was interrupted by an email coming through and I glanced down at my laptop; it was from a mate I knew. Howard was a fellow poet whom I’d met last year in May, who would often send me stories that someone had sent his way. As I read the text before me I soon came to realize there were folk who faced much crueller tests and tears welled in my eyes. “My full name is Mildred Hondorf and for thirty years or more I have taught piano lessons to young children by the score. “Though I’ve taught a lot of students who have shown ability, there were sadly some among them who were challenged musically. Of that number was young Robby and he had a single Mum and the lad was now eleven … much too old I thought to come. ‘“But it’s always been my mother’s dream to hear me play,” he said, and those haunting words still linger to this day within my head. Robby had no tone or rhythm and this fact he could not hide. He just lacked inborn ability, but still the lad he tried. “He learnt elementary pieces and would dutifully review all the scales I put before him, but deep down inside I knew that the poor child showed no promise and would never learn to play but each week his words would echo, ‘Mum will hear me play some day.’ “Robby’s mother always smiled and waved, though did so from her car and I’d never met her personally in any way so far. Then one day Rob never came again. I guessed he’d just moved on. Though I must admit I felt at ease now that the lad was gone. “He was not a good advertisement for what I was about and then several weeks on down the track I sent some flyers out. For I had in mind an evening, a recital on a night where the parents, friends and relatives could see them in full flight. “It seems Robby too received one and he asked if he could try, but I told him it’s impossible, he did not qualify. You have not attended lessons, so it really wasn’t fair. ‘But my mum was sick!’ Young Rob explained, ‘she couldn’t drive me there.’ ‘“I’ve been practising Miss Hondorf and Mum wants to hear me play.’ I don’t know how he persuaded me, but Robby got his way. He’d perform before my closer, just in case his effort died and that way I’d salvage self-esteem or bluntly … save my pride. “Well the evening had gone splendidly and Rob was paged on next, but the sight of his appearance … well, it truly left me vexed. The lad’s clothes were unironed, wrinkled and his hair was quite a mess and it looked like an eggbeater had been through it I confess. “But he sat at his piano and announced out very loud he would play Mozart’s Concerto in C Major for the crowd. His small fingers danced so nimbly on the ivories that’s for sure and I know that Mozart would have been amazed at what he saw. “Robby ended his performance in a grand crescendo style and the crowd just stood applauding while I had the biggest smile. I just hugged the lad and asked him ‘How’d you do it? Don’t be shy.’ And he spoke into the microphone and gave his proud reply. “Well my Mum has been real sick of late, she’d cancer in her chest, and she passed away this morning Miss. I had to play my best. Mum was born quite deaf you see, but prayed with all her might, that one day she’d hear me playing and I know she heard tonight.”

©Bush Poet Merv Webster The Goondiwindi Grey

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You are ike gold stones falshing in my eyes

You are a pop star on stage.

You are pizza with vinegar on

You are my favourite personYou feel like soft cotton against my skin

You are skegness full of hotels and fun.

You are happy like me

You are coca cola bubbles in the cup.

You are like lego, stuck together.

Callum Griffith** England **8 years

---

He says they talk to him day and night,

He says sometimes they will and sometimes they might.

He calls them the demons inside his head, they even talk when he's in bed.

They tell him bad things about his looks, then they tell him

"OH WELL LIFE JUST SUCKS!"

He thinks the world are all against him, they tell him he's leading a life of sin.

Then sometimes they tell him he's better than the rest, then next thing they tell him his life is a mess.

They haunt his thoughts take away his dreams, they call with whispers then sometimes with screams.

They make out it was us that spoke to him, he calls us a name and thinks we are grim.

Then when we say "but it wasn't us" he gets mad and needs a buzz.

You see as well as the illness! he too does drugs, he says its the way he gets his hugs.

He feels normal when on this crap, if he's not ill he's drugged or taking a nap.

That's what his life contains, he acts like it's all full of games.

He doesnt realize the danger he's in, every time he has drugs he is throwing his life in the bin.

But it's no good telling him! for he is ill, and at the moment nothing will help not even a pill

Lissa Griffith-- England

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I'ts hard living in a fallen world

hating responsibility can't share my pain

you dont care anyway

a hunger different from the rest

not for food or romance but for death

upside down and inside out

why should i get out of bed tomorrow

wont be a better day

Better days dont exist

too hard to concentrate

not even going to try

my whole lifes been a failure

when am i going to die?

s m ward.

---

 

1ST PRIZE

SUICIDE NOTE

It's hard to tell you why I'm like this

So I think it best if I do not

unknowing why my arms a scarred

with cuts and burns-red hot.

You tell me that it's for attention

and I will beg to differ however

I may not fully understand just why

I'm like this either

please don't judge me for how I cope with the pain

and burdens life brings

Its just to difficult to comprehend the dealings with these things

I hope you understand my ways of heading down this path

if it wasn't for the love you brought

I would not have made it this far.

S M Ward

---

TWO STORIES

There is someone out there looking in

close my eyes tight they are still there trying to get within

I wont loose this fight close the doors and seal them fovever

they dont understand, why do they try to convince me to give up,

let go your too clever

Mum's on the floor beside my lifeless body

her hands on my heart her touch of life

not enough her love

not as pure as the drug racing around my body

I slit my wrist and the colour red

I lie dying the last breath a breeze my lungs collapsing

then I slowly drift away lead by ladies golden all

over singing melodies to beautiful to recall

looking down on you now,

Mum! I start to wonder why, how is it i was so confused

injecting love into my veins instead of my heart

please forgive me my beautiful mum

for you still have life to live but when your days on earth are over

you shall nurture me once again

waking up from this horrible dream

my face wet with tears rethinking the events

of that night I could not save my only son

I forced my life into his body he rejected me still

he thought his time on earth was over

death his only will.

Sheree M Ward --Brisbane